Sable Starr: Queen of the Pussies

Here are some photos of 70's groupie teen Sable Starr. Famous groupies tend to be the coolest, most popular, most aggressive, and most charismatic girl in the room, so it's always kind of a downer reading their stories- had they been guys, they probably would have been rock stars themselves.

Sable was like 14 when she dated/slept with all these dudes, which seems like it flew a bit more in the 70's. Not that I'm condoning it, man. These pubescent groupies would hit the scene in halter tops, daisy dukes, boas, and mile high platforms.

In her memoir, I'm With the Band, fellow famous groupie Pamela Des Barres trashes Sable and her ilk; I guess the baby groupies were mean to her and called her an "old bag" in front of the Whiskey or something which she took personally even though she was only 23 herself. To quoth Bebe Buell, "Who does Pamela think she is? Queen of the pussies?"

Anyway, she had the 70s trash look down, that's for sure.

Mary's Non-Zombie Movie Review Korner

I apologize for being a negligent blogger lately. Here is a post about documentaries I've watched recently, which you should also watch!

Pie in the Sky: The Brigid Berlin Story, 2000
This documentary is about Brigid Berlin, AKA Brigid Polk, who tends to fall under the umbrella term of "Warhol superstar" though they were in fact peers and he stole ideas from her. Unlike many documentaries about women with connections to famous men, Pie in the Sky is truly about its subject, not her relationship with Andy Warhol. She has had a fascinating life, from her rebellion from the wealthy WASP society she was born into, to her self portraits, Polaroids, and other artwork, to her relationship to food and her body and her family. She is definitely one of the last holdouts of the old, truly artsy weirdo New York. Though she came from a monied background like Edie Sedgewick, Brigid was the anti-Edie in so many ways, and she will never be played by Sienna Miller or be canonized by fashion magazines because she was no muse- which I mean in the best way possible.

Brigid is still an artist: look at these fucking needlepoint pillows! I have come to the conclusion that I hate 99% of art, but these pillows are something I would want to own myself. Also, her apartment is mind-blowing.

Paris is Burning, 1990

Many liberal-artsy types have seen this film, but for those who haven't, you should really see it. It's another New York story (living in New York has made me nerdily obsessed with all aspects of NYC history), depicting balls, which encompass a wide range of drag performances, as well as the origin of voguing, participated in by mostly poor, gay and minority youth. Like Pie in the Sky, I think this movie subverts the idea of what art and artists are, as well as what drag is, and plenty of other stuff: the people in this movie are nothing if not artists, constantly creating and making something out of nothing.

I've read plenty of criticism of Paris is Burning (by bell hooks, among others) which asserts that the touch is too lighthearted and trivializes these people's lives. I disagree; the first time I saw this movie, it seemed more depressing than anything else; it was upon second watching that I was so impressed with what the people in the film were accomplishing. Also, this movie features kids hanging out on the legendary Christopher Street piers, which for a long time were a hangout for gay kids who often had no other place to go. I don't really know what they are like now, except that Simone and I saw a documentary about them being "cleaned up" that played the Madonna song "This Used to be My Playground" and we laughed in a theater filled with self-righteous types.

(This is a dude, man.)

Decline of Western Civilization, Part 2, 1988
When this movie started, I was like, "Oh no, another movie glorifying rapey dudes", since glorifying rapey dudes is a big part of many movies. Hair metal, after all, (though rife with the contradiction of men essentially dressed as women, who also hate women) shares a lot with modern gangster rap, in that money, hos, and flashy lifestyles reign supreme. But as it progressed, director Penelope Spheeris (Wayne's World, man) probed more deeply and the results are amazing.

While male vulnerability is constantly avoided in most films, Spheeris spends much of her time getting these macho braggarts to admit they are alcoholics with no discernible skills who make music even they know is second-rate and whose whole life is predicated on being a huge star. When Paul Stanley of Kiss (depicted above surrounded by soft core-looking ladies) is asked whether he could fall in love with a groupie she pans over the faces of the groupies themselves to see their reactions. Many of the men admit that they not only dress like stereotypical prostitutes (see assless chaps photo above), they also basically prostitute themselves to women for food and a place to stay, despite being huge misogynists. The interview with some guy from W.A.S.P., who starts out bragging, eventually confesses he hates himself as he chugs vodka in his parents pool as his mother looks on.

Also, it's obviously worth watching for stylistic reasons. By the end, you don't even notice the hair. Speaking of which, maybe my hair should look more like this. What the hell happened to doing your hair? You literally cannot tell what gender people are half the time. Also there is one guy whose hair is half blond and half brown and the most amazing hair I've ever seen but I don't have a photo.

Heavy Metal Parking Lot, 1986

I don't know, this might be, like, one of my favorite all-time movies, I've mentioned it here before, but it's truly amazing. Just watch it. It also fits in with my assertion about guys being foxier in the 70's. Even though this is from 1986, it has a 70's vibe. I'm too tired to write any more, except that the girl who says "Hell yeah," repeatedly and has the personality of Wooderson in Dazed and Confused is my hero.

Lady Gaga: Y/N?

I'm always convinced award shows are going to be entertaining/worth critiquing, but it always turns out they never are either, because they are always typical and boring as hell. I turned off the Grammys during the supposedly 3-D (Whatever! The 3-D glasses I took from Avatar didn't work! I knew I should have returned them!) nonsensical Michael Jackson tribute. It's like, does anyone ever really want to see Jamie Foxx do anything? Why?

Anyway, I did see some of Lady Gaga's Elton John duet, which was totally boring just like Elton John himself, except for the always transcendent Tiny Dancer. I also saw Taylor Swift bringing down poor Stevie Nicks, whom she was not fit to share a stage with, and, if I never see Taylor Swift again, I would be pretty happy. When I watch things like this, I always think, "Why are these people, of all people, famous? What do The Black Eyed Peas have that other people don't? Why is Usher still here? Lady Antebellum? What? Do you guys even know what that name means?" The whole thing is such a mindless slog, and it's hard to tell who is excited about anything.

So, that's why at least a Beyonce, or a Lady Gaga makes sense. These people are showmen. They wear more exciting clothes, have more charisma than most, sing and perform (mostly) better, catchier songs (again, The Black Eyed Peas- what is going on with their "music?" Who buys their albums? I did like Fergie's 80's whore dress, though), and at least are an event unto themselves. It's interesting to me that Lady Gaga is famous because she would not have been in the pop princess-dominated early 2000s, but now the tide has turned and we are ready for every person to wear glitter shoulder pads once again. I'm glad that Lady Gaga has turned her mainstream success into a platform for performance art, and that she has chosen to get weirder instead of more normal as time goes on. I would much rather little girls like her and know of her existence than the existence of Taylor Swift. I am also glad she declined to be in the new re-recording of "We Are the World."

Of course, Lady Gaga is not really weird, and the weirdest thing is that she is always being treated as weird, particularly in this day and age. I saw this magazine page that listed Leigh Bowery as one of her influences, and it's like, you know who's weird? Leigh Bowery. And even before him, David Bowie was weird. Cher was weird. Prince was weird. Even Madonna was weird, kind of. And they didn't have stylists. What's weird is that everyone's like, "Oh, this futuristic glam thing is so weird! So new!" but doesn't everyone remember when futuristic glam was THE dominant aesthetic in music for a long time, and that once upon a time, having an extreme, poetic, artistic, bold, raunchy aesthetic was a huge part of music?

Look at these (totally mainstream) weirdos! Remember them? They grabbed their crotches and simulated masturbation and wore feathered headpieces to the Oscars with the best of them, and today we can't even handle Adam Lambert in a suit leading someone on a leash like nothing like it before has ever happened in the history of musical entertainment. One step forward, two steps back, dudes!

PS: Speaking of people who are still "hot" even though they were also "hot" when I was in middle school (ie, Usher, an eighth grade dance staple), Green Day really needs to give it a rest. Like, really.

The Jonas Brothers Vs. The Bay City Rollers

God it sucks how bands used to look so amazing and now being in a band just means you've found new ways to reinterpret the world tool.

Black Sabbath used to be an awesome band. I love how they are so "dark" that they're always posing in front of churches or in graveyards. So proto-goth, even though what makes them great is the fact that they are just dumb hard rock band. And, in the late 60's, Ozzy was actually pretty attractive:




And here is The Sweet, who had a cheeky, exuberant 70's glam persona. I'm so jealous of teenagers during this time period because this was like mainstream, bubblegum, teen idol-driven pop-rock of the time and it was actually good, unlike the Jonas Brothers of today who admittedly are pretty entertaining because they're dressed by brilliant gays who put them in skintight tuxedos, but nobody wants to listen to whatever pro-tooled piece of crap they pretend to play. I think there must have been a real obsession with glam Indians during the 70's, what with the Cher half-breed phenomenon and such, and everyone's preoccupation with feathers, leather, and "natural" things.




As you can see, it was a very crotch-focused time. Check out that metallic leather fringed loincloth in the second photo! When is Joe Jonas (whichever that one is, but i know it's one of them) going to show up in a metallic fringed loincloth? Come on, gay handlers of the Jonas Brothers! You've already got them in pointy shoes and sharkskin suits! Push the envelope! Here's a video of my favorite Sweet song, Wig Wam Bam. This is one of the best "live" performances I have ever seen.

Then there's the Bay City Rollers. They were the ultimate in 70's bubblegum pop, who, like, most boy bands, are really unattractive individually but somehow gained some sort of rare power over t(w)eens after being shown capering around homosexually in whatever ridiculous outfits was considered acceptable at the time. Of course, the BCRs, as they will henceforth be known, have some excellent songs, such as their big hit, Saturday Night. (They also inspired two Nick Lowe songs about them when Nick Lowe was trying to get out of his record contract or something, which are pretty funny.)



The Scottish BCRs could usually be seen in half-shirts, tartan jumpsuits, tam-o-shanters and huge platforms shoes. Dan has one of their records that has a photo of each of them with info under it, like their favorite colors, nicknames and waist measurements. (One confesses his biggest dislike is "cruelty to animals"; his favorite food, "well-done steak.")

That's pretty much it! Except that here are some more photos of Cher you should probably see: