Classic RITS- Mary's Musings: Ladies in Comedy/Take That, Horatio Sanz

Hey dudes! I've decided to "recycle" (or wait, let's call it "upcycle"; nothing obnoxious about that word) some classic Rip it To Shreds posts. I enjoy rereading them from time to time, and perhaps you will too! Now, a post about Comedy from 2008.

I started to read this Vanity Fair profile of Tina "The New American Sweetheart" Fey, and like three-quarters of the way through it, I realized it was entirely, entirely about the way she looks. She used to be 150 pounds! Ohmygod, so fat! And by "fat', we mean normal but of course that's unacceptable and she'll never be on the cover of VF half-nude! That scar! We have to know! But now she wears low-cut tops and Seven jeans and looks "like a really pretty graduate student!" Not old, guys! Kind of hot! She and Sarah Palin are both "hot librarian" types! Guys, she's smart and funny and PRETTY, did you hear? Inititally she was told she wasn't hot enough to be on SNL, haha! Keep in mind that's a show that featured Horatio Sanz! Then she went to Weight Watchers! Steve Martin used to ignore her but hit on her after she lost weight! That's fun and flattering, right? Not gross that an accomplished, talented writer and comedian can only get attention for being hot, right?

(By the way, Rachael Dratch was supposed to play Jane Krakowski's role on 30 Rock, but was nixed for not being hot enough. Also, whatever happened to Cheri Oteri? Also, is Jimmy Fallon really getting a late night talk show? Really? Is he going to start cracking up at his own weak delivery? Maybe bust out the acoustic guitar and forget some lines? Oooh, I hope Horatio Sanz will be involved. Have we heard from him since that movie with Cuba Gooding Jr. where he pretended to be gay on a cruise ship? Snow Dogs?)

At first, I was like, "Obviously a dude wrote this," but of course it was actually Maureen Dowd, who is one of those weird writers like Camille Paglia who are labeled as feminists but have dubious cred and kind of seem to hate women- Dowd, of course, once accused Al Gore of being so feminine (because he cared about the environment!) that he was "practically lactating." And, of course, Vanity Fair is a totally obnoxious, sexist magazine that I have always hated, long before I actually read the editor's letter about women not being funny. Which I did read, and not that many people seemed to concerned about at the time.

It barely needs to be said that funny women are rarely represented in comedy. Mostly they are the sexy girlfriends who roll their eyes at their hilarious manchild of a boyfriend (hey second coming of Seth Rogan's career), or, if they are in a romantic comedy, or tween comedy, they are the sexy but prat-fall prone hapless moppet, someone charmingly clumsy but with perfect hair. And then, the real female comedians are few and far between, and can rarely match the success of their male counterparts. And, of course, if they do, they are constantly subjected to an in-depth examination of their looks and/or massive amounts of airbrushing.

Anyway, I could go on about how I hate Sarah Silverman's ditzy "I am five years old" delivery (hey, even if you're making a "funny" pose, you're still just posing in Maxim in your underwear) or how we are sadly lacking the salty, older-woman comedy stylings of such luminaries as Phyllis Diller (up there in the yellow) and Joan Rivers, but what I'm really, really trying to say is that Amy Sedaris should be more famous, not only because she is hilarious and unique, but because she is one of the few comedians who actually challenges what it means to be a woman in comedy, and does not rely on being cute or airbrushed to make her point. And, unlike other female comedians who still try to hard to entice their male (and female) fans, she actually makes an effort to fearlessly gross people out, which seems to be one of the number one of- limits topics for female comedians, because it shows that you are more than your boobs and/or your potential hotness. At the same time, Amy does not deny that she is a woman and women are funny; she just celebrates ballsy, overlooked female archetypes in a way that distances her own looks from her characters, at the same time illustrating that women can be just as loud, campy, revolting, sexual, and funny as any other comedian.

PS: If you're not familiar with Amy Sedaris, I'd like to recommend both her TV show, Strangers With Candy, and her book, I Like You, which is a take-off on retro household hints types books. Speaking of which, I am obsessed with retro household hints-type books and will be doing a post on them soon!

Good Attitude

The Jenny Archetype: Greasy Hair, Broken Dreams

Remember Jenny? Sure, Forrest Gump himself had adventures a-plenty, but poor Jenny just had bad stuff happen to her. The quintessential crappy female character, Jenny was there for Forrest to save, much like the woman Sling Blade saved in that terrible movie. Lank and downtrodden, Jenny was constantly being abused and exploited. Sadly, Jenny never gets her own story or power. The movie ends with her getting pregnant with Forrest's child and then dying. 

This sort of downtrodden, abused and passive female character is an archetype in American cinema. Often from the wrong side of the tracks, the Jenny can be anything from an abused hooker to an abused housewife. She has lived hard, and she will probably have sex with/be saved by the main character, who may or may not be mentally deficient. Her lank, greasy hair and unfashionable-by-Hollywood-standards wardrobe are also keys to her inner pysche. Generally considered "low class", the Jenny probably won't be getting married any time soon, being much more likely to die in some harrowing way before the movie ends.

Speaking of women who are abused and have sex with Billy Bob Thorton, here's Halle Berry in Monster's Ball. I remember seeing this movie for free cause my friend worked at a movie theater, and then my other friend was like, "This is the worst movie ever" and we left. True story.

In Broken Flowers, Bill Murray wonders why all the women he used to date are like, such old bitches now even though he's still so cool and great. He briefly has an encounter with a Jenny type, played by Tilda Swinton, but luckily she fends him off with a shotgun.

Here's Emily Blunt in 2012's pretty boring Looper. Okay, she does some stuff, but mostly the stuff involves protecting her son who happens to be magic, which has some convoluted connection to the plot of the movie. And she's only abused by her magic son. She does have sex with the main character, played by Joseph Gordon Levitt, and she sure is downtrodden!

What are some other examples of this character? I know there are a ton more, but this was all I could think of. Gaby suggested "every role Jennifer Jason Leigh has ever played."

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Old-Fashioned Ugly Urban Post: Take that, Eugene O'Neill!

Gross. In the past couple (five?) years, it became "cool" to have an ugly holiday sweater party, and it seems that Urban has recently got hip to this and is now "renewing" some fugly sweaters that are not even close to being vintage. I remember people buying them at the store I worked at in Philadelphia, and always found it depressing that people were spending money on something ugly when they could be wearing something pretty/cool. No matter where you live, they're not exactly hard to find for significantly cheaper than $34 at a real thrift store. But the most truly witty and ironic versions can be had at Urban, where they seem to be doing little to nothing to enhance these stupid sweaters and jack up the price. Fun fact: Tory Burch's now ex-husband (and probs her) grew rich on importing these in the 80's!

Wait, what? What is the political statement here, exactly? JFK was shot well before Changes was even written, and Changes was also written well before David Bowie had a lightning bolt on his face anyway!!! This is like the stupidest wannabe pop-art mashup ever. I notice that new Urban is trying to stray from the goth thing and now be a little punk/biker, but either way they remain edgy as hell. Do you even dare to wear this in polite company???

This one is just so cool. It has these cool, deep things written on it, and it looks really old and torn and stuff, but it actually just came out of a factory overseas this way!

Haha, this one also has some totes random gibberish on it too! It's like some dark, edgy gibberish. Actually, who cares it's not like I feel bad for Eugene O'Neill not like he never got any credit.

I can understand the appeal of the cut-out back as much as anyone, but not everything is meant to have a cut-out. A plaid flannel shirt is one of those things. How do you even wear a bra with this? Who wants to wear a baggy flannel shirt without a bra? 

This is just sad Urban styling. Maybe the ill-fitting skirt could work in a fun 70's way, maybe the top would be okay with black skinny jeans or a silver mini or something, but together this is just a sad, weird combo. Who would look at this image and think, "I want that look. I want that to be me."? On the plus side, the model's hair has slightly more volume than years past.

Ugh! Why is there a back cut-out and a tie that ties underneath over your jeans? It really seems like Urban is desperate to add more, more, more back cut-outs and details wherever they can be found! But it's like, you gotta know when to fold 'em. And that was before you added that droopy butt tie. Plus, over jeans, that's weird.

So, they're back. Maybe. Just as a I predicted, yin-yangs seem to be slowly edging their way back from 90's-era dominance to regain a coveted spot upon the bodies of the young people who have $34 to spend on this t-shirt. This tee brings to mind wonderful memories for me: sleepaway camp in 1994, puberty, biker shorts.... But you don't need to have a personal connection with this shirt to see that it's ugly. With the dasiy yin- yangs, the dirty look, the splotchy tie-dye, it's all there before your eyes!