Friday, March 21, 2008

Big Ugly Shoes

There has been a real epidemic lately of big ugly shoes. While previously the dainty pointy toe and spindly stiletto a la Manolo Blahnik was hot, now everybody has to have something towering and full of buckles and basically resembling a medieval torture device.

I actually love a large and chunky shoe- I prefer wedges to high heels both in terms of shape and comfort- high heels often look like an absence of shoe to me, and who wants that? And I love stuff with crap allover it- these, for instance, are pretty fab.

But these new shoes are just aggressively ugly. What's worse, you're supposed to wear them with three pairs of scrunch socks and two pairs of tights and some horrible sack of a dress in black, brown, gray, or perhaps grayish brown if you're feeling nuts. They're supposed to be another bumpy neutral layer in the series of them cascading down your body- very Marc Jacobs fall o7!

At least if they were all worn with, I don't know, jungle print mini dresses or what Tina Turner wore in the Mad Max sequel, they would make sense, in an apocalyptic/fierce type of way.

The Sartorialist always features women who wear muted sacks and these types of nine million dollar shoes, and the woman above is really rocking the look, complete with the sloppy scrunched pants, retarded hat, multiple scarves (what is it with people and scarves these days?) and dreary color scheme. It looks like she emerged from a pile of rags.

The lady on the right is also working the million dollar dreary hobo style. Can you imagine picking this woman out of a crowd to photograph her outfit? What exactly is the draw here? Maybe it's the overwhelming zest, passion and creativity that practically leaps out of the photo.

Aren't you just dying to pair these Gaultiers with something baggy and woolen?


Here are some more of them in action. The woman with the ski hat is really looking like a consummate fashion victim to me, where everything is clearly designer but somehow looks cheap and fails to play off each other. The black stuff is supposed to look all 80's dominatrix, the coat is like 60's shearling style with racing stripes, and the hat is just ugly/appropriate for a small child only. I guess she's attempting some color but it's all clashing.

The woman on the right is just completely boring. She's wearing a boxy pea coat and some black tights, I see, along with the consummate chunky shoes she will love for one more season and then deam so over when thigh-high square toe Doc Martens swarm the fashion world.

6 comments:

Simone said...

God, i WISH people were walking around dressed like tina turner in that movie. Life would be so much more interesting!

It's like, these shoes aren't just ugly and big, they're all high and platformed, and it gives one the look of constantly being on the verge of toppling over. It's like, giant shoe, skinny boney-knee-ed legs, and then, like, an egg/sack shape on top.

Also, the lack of color kills me. KILLS.

Anonymous said...

I don't know... I kind of like them... who want's dainty shoes?
And you are totally right about that Doc Marten thing. They are 100% making a comeback. Watch out, this time next year they will be everywhere.

Mary said...

i don't like dainty shoes, but these particular shoes are definitely not my bag either.

i can't tell if doc martens are really coming back or if it's just hype. they haven't even been over long enough for them to come back! such is modern fashion.

i think tina is wearing a metal mesh mini dress!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

oh my god, where did you get the pic of those shoes that you refered to as a "medieval torture device"? My girl will go nuts over them. All you have is a pic. No manufacturer or where i can buy a pair for her. Can you help? thanks!
You can send reply to phony.fake.account@gmail.com
yes, that's a REAL email addy!

Mary said...

i guess they're barbara bui because that's the website they're from. i don't know the style name or anything. but this is an older post so i don't know if they're still available. it's worth a try though.