I Liked It: Nothing Compares 2 90's Alterna-Stars

I am in New York sort of doing rock camp this week (as well as laboriously counting up the votes for my previous post) so I can't write a lot this week.


However, I felt kind of offended by this post on Go Fug Yourself, which disses on 90's tween (and uh, ethereal mystery girl in movies such as Donnie Darko) star Jena Malone, noting that she can't decide whether she is the "second coming of Lori Petty, or auditioning for a Sinead O'Connor biopic."

I say this is a positive thing. Jena Malone does not look styled in the least. She looks like someone in her late teens/early twenties who has carefully chosen to wear real, not-even-laced-up-all-the-way combat boots and a mohawk as some sort of fabulous, angsty "fuck you" to both, you know, Amanda Bynes and the people who praise Amanda Bynes for looking like a pageant contestant. I love the look on her face- you know, the look that says, "This is dumb."

Because it is dumb. It's dumb that we expect girls as young as thirteen to be perfectly buffed, shined and styled by some withered, tanorexic harpy or any other kind of stylist who has chosen the hippest, most flattering, but also least risky fashion-wise (but also most sexy) clothes for this underage individual to wear. It's wrong that we have teen stars that we are supposed to look to for style and sex appeal when they are, pretty much, children. But we all know that.

[Cue most horrifying photo of Miley Cyrus found in first page of Google image search.]


It's not right, my friends. But what is also not right is that once, in a long ago time that I've already written about fifty times but still cannot emphasize enough, the idea of the second coming of Lori Petty was not so far-fetched. (In case you didn't know, Lori Petty was the spunky, offbeat- some might say "weird"- star of such films as Tank Girl and League Of Her Own.) There was a time when starring in a Sinead O'Connor biopic might have been a wise career choice. It's a biopic I personally would see! She ripped up a photo of the pope on live television! She had a shaved head! Everyone called her a "bitch!" It was such a big deal!

So I would like to give "props" to Jena Malone for forging out her own path in these difficult times for young starlets. I can only hope that the tide will, eventually, turn, and the demand for plastic, lithe-limbed pubescent girls in $1200 dresses will give way to a renewed appreciation for the artsy, the unique, and the unstyled. Until then, I shall complain a lot, light some candles at my shrine of Christina Ricci's old face, and, of course, await the Second Coming of Lori Petty.