Hope 4 the New Year

As much as I would like to pool all my hope on our new president, my cynical nature and "ultra liberal" political leanings tell me that relying so heavily on an elected official, especially one who rose to the highest office possible, is both naive and unwise. (I still like Michelle though, especially her ballsy election-night outfit.) So let's stick to fashion, the failings of which might, at times, feel equally depressing, but, ultimately, lead to far less economic depression and global downfall.

Whilst browsing through the thoroughly entertaining Lookbook website, I felt the need to compile a list of trends that need to die with the new year. It wasn't hard. These are like all from the first page.

1. The sloppy layered scarf:

Especially this fucking scarf. Take off this fucking scarf already! Just stop wearing it, America!

I won't comment on the rest of the look, which is soooo early 2000s! Who knows what I mean? Who's ready for 2000s nostalgia??? Wow, what a decade.

How about every single trend on this pair of tools:

Let's count them!
2. Face paint- that's "tribal," guys! Speaking of being fun and ethnic, how about the
3. Afrika collection from
4. American Apparel?
5. Leggings as pants/entire outift.
6. Let's not forget they're still wearing those dumbass scarves
7. Bill Gates glasses
8. Friendship bracelets? Not the first we've seen, and sadly, probably not the last.
9. General 80's/early 90's fug.

Apparently this is the same girl, but here she's spicing things up with
10. Sally Jesse Raphael glasses and
11. A skirt hiked up over her boobs masquerading as a foul top.
12. Plaid! Who else loves plaid? Everyone!

What about this one?
13. That fucking beanie hat perched on the back of the head seen on several other photos in this post.
14. The huge 80's shirt worn as a dress
15. Not wearing pants.

Also, this girl:

I'm all for the neo-Debbie Harry look (obviously) but this crosses over from hipster to terrifying at some point. This girl will haunt me in my dreams. Is she seven? It's like, this is what it would be if pageant mothers tarted up their children to attract Cisco Adler instead of closeted Southern queens. Also, hello, Mishapes is over! Whoa, another early 2000s reference!

Unfortunately the Lookbook website wouldn't let me look at any more photos for some reason.

How depressing that the 2000s are almost over and there is pretty much nothing to define the decade, except for the rise of the $16 H&M sack dress, the realization that ipods are really attractive and that everything from homewares to candy should look just like them and the revival of the late 80s and 90s which is not so much horrifying because those were ugly times, but because we all know the mid-late 90s will be hot on their heels.