Sometimes it seems like Urban Outfitters is really trying to recreate some kind of ugly thrift store find- the kind where someone bounds up to you in some shining, drooping polyester sack that a Russian grandmother clearly recently gave to Goodwill because it became too out of style even for her, crowing about how it only cost $5 and isn't that a steal and you're like, "Um, yeah..." It's bad enough when there is only one of these items around, but Urban Outfitters just seems so intent on mass-producing these types of things. I mean, the fact that you will probably see other people wearing the exact same thing makes one wonder why the hell anyone would actually purchase stuff like this.
Case in point: the Lux Kaleidoscope Dress, (which, they warn, "Runs big, you may choose to order a size down.") What is even going on here? It looks like a bad acid trip. Why is the front yoke gray and red? Why are the sleeves so puffy? Who knew a floral print could be so depressing? The model looks like she is trying to escape from the dress and is attempting to hide herself within its droopy folds, like a turtle retreating into its shell. But I bet it's even scarier inside.