Monday, January 29, 2007

Jeans of Death

These unfortunate-looking Drainpipe Corset Waist Jeans from Topshop recently caught my eye. Obviously, there's not that much to say- they make the rather forlorn-looking model's butt look very long and flat; they literally have a separate button-up corset part that ends somewhere far past your bellybutton and appears to be made of a different color denim, and they have cheesy strategic fading and whiskers.

Perhaps worse are the Cheap Monday jeans above, which I don't have a specific link to (but I can direct you to this gallery of horrors on the Cheap Monday website- don't look if you have a weak stomach) because, unlike the Topshops, they couldn't even be worn if you were dressing up as Tiffany for Halloween. They're just really, really high, and really, really unflattering. It must take like ten minutes to zip up your fly in these babies.

While these jeans on their own scare me, what scares me more is the question they force me to ask: is this the future of denim? Will people really re-embrace this look? Is it going to be really hard to find normal jeans soon? Questions like these make me want to stockpile jeans like these and these, and hunker down for the oncoming denim apocalypse.

1 comment:

Gaby + Simone said...

these jeans scare me real bad. it's like you're having some sort of really, really bad acid trip, where all the zippers and flies are, like, miles long, and hot dogs are talking to you, and you jump off a building because someone's fly is chasing you and it's blowing your mind. yeah.